Yolanda P's Experience
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Experience description:
I
was asleep and in the middle of a dream where I was on the stereotypical
analyst's couch talking to a hypnotherapist who was seated next to me. This part
was no doubt a dream. Then suddenly I felt (and heard) this incredibly intense
"whooshing" sound and I seemed to stand straight up.
I
was in pitch black darkness and I felt the most unbelievable bliss that I've
ever experienced in my life. The first thing I thought was "wow, this is better
than drugs!" It's hard to even put into words how amazing it felt, I have
nothing to compare it with. It felt like sheer heaven.
Even
though it was completely black, I wasn't afraid. The darkness seemed full of
potential. Not empty at all, but just filled with amazing bliss and happiness. I
felt totally myself and whole.
I
decided to start walking. After a while I saw a city with multi-colored street
lights ahead. I had a vague feeling that I was following someone who was ahead
of me, that this person was leading me to where I was supposed to go.
I
felt loved and whole and happier than I ever thought was humanly possible, but
after a while I started to resist going forward. I had a feeling I was going to
meet someone, God possibly, and I felt like I wasn't ready or worthy yet. The
colors seemed to get brighter but gold was becoming the most prominent one. I
kept fighting though, which I now really regret. I know I was loved and
accepted, I felt that completely, but my low opinion of myself and my fear of
being laid bare in front of what might possibly be my maker made me fight to
stop.
It
stopped finally and then I don't remember anything else until the next morning.
I
also started to think maybe I was an O.K. person because of the love and
acceptance and bliss during the experience.
At the time of your experience was there an associated life-threatening event?
Uncertain I found out a few years later that I have severe sleep apnea, so I'm
not sure if I actually stopped breathing during the experience.
Was
the experience difficult to express in words?
Yes There's really no "earthly" equivalent to that bliss that I can compare
it to. Take every drug that gets you high, every happy experience you've ever
had, and multiply it and it still pales in comparison.
At
what time during the experience were you at your highest level of
consciousness and alertness?
The whole time.
How
did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience
compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness?
More
consciousness and alertness than normal I just felt so alive and whole and
completely myself, and unbelievably happy and loved.
Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that
you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.
The
colors were incredibly vivid and bright and amazing.
Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that
you had immediately prior to the time of the experience.
I
didn't really hear anything that I remember. No one talked to me.
Did you see or hear any earthly events that were occurring during a time that
your consciousness / awareness was apart from your physical / earthly body?
No
What emotions did you feel during the experience?
It
was more than feeling peaceful, it was feeling ALIVE, blissful beyond words,
totally whole and loved.
Did
you pass into or through a tunnel?
No
Did
you see an unearthly light?
Uncertain The colored lights of the streetlamps become brighter and brighter
as I got closer until they seemed to blend together. It wasn't a light at the
end of a tunnel though, it was a combination of colored lights that were part of
a city I was walking toward.
Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an
unidentifiable voice?
No
It's hard to say. I think there was someone further ahead of me that I somehow
knew I was supposed to follow, but I couldn't see them clearly.
Did
you encounter or become aware of any beings who previously lived on earth who
are described by name in religions (for example: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha,
etc.)?
No
Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings?
No
Did you become aware of past events in your life during your experience?
No
Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world?
Some unfamiliar
and strange place
I
didn't really know where I was at first, but I started to realize I might be in
another realm. It didn't seem humanly possible to feel that good. It felt
heavenly.
Did time seem to speed up or slow down?
No
Did you suddenly seem to understand everything?
No
Did
you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?
No
Did you come to a border or point of no return?
No
Did
scenes from the future come to you?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
suggesting that there either is (or is not) continued existence after earthly
life (�life after death�)?
Uncertain It seemed to be a heavenly place but nothing specific was said to me
about it. I just kind of knew it was another place or dimension and that I was
probably going to meet someone if I continued.
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that God or a supreme being either does (or does not) exist?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that you either did (or did not) exist prior to this lifetime?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
that a mystical universal connection or unity/oneness either does (or does not)
exist?
Uncertain I felt connected and yet still totally myself as an individual.
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding earthly life�s meaning or purpose?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding earthly life�s difficulties, challenges, or hardships?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any specific information / awareness
regarding love?
No
During your experience, did you encounter any other specific information /
awareness that you have not shared in other questions that is relevant to living
our earthly lives?
No
Did
you have a sense of knowing special knowledge or purpose?
No
What occurred during your experience included:
Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at
the time of your experience I was not expecting it, I thought if I ever had
this type of experience it would probably be the scary kind, so I was very
PLEASANTLY surprised! At the time I really believed nobody loved me, not even
God if he/she existed. It was consistent in that I've heard about NDEs and
believed they were real, and I have a friend who had an out of body experience
that she described as blissful and that gave her knowledge that there is nothing
that can truly harm us in this life.
How
accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events
that occurred around the time of the experience?
I
remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred
around the time of the experience It's not something you would ever forget, it
was the most amazing experience I have ever had.
Discuss any changes that might have occurred in your life after your
experience:
I
remind myself of the experience if I'm feeling down or worthless. I felt like I
was totally loved no matter what I thought of myself (I felt very worthless
before this happened and even fought to stop the experience because of that).
My experience directly resulted in:
Unknown
Did you have any changes in your values or beliefs after the experience that
occurred as a result of the experience?
Uncertain I do believe there is a force or energy we can tap into, although
I'm not sure if there is a personal God who judges or is even one individual
being that controls everything. I think of it now as the Life Force or Love and
that we are all a part of it. I could be wrong though. But if it is a personal
God it is very loving and not the way most religions describe.
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful
or significant to you?
The
stark contrast between dreaming and then coming out of the dream into this
experience. I could see the difference between the two. The experience did not
feel dreamlike.
Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your
experience that you did not have before the experience?
No
Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful
or significant to you?
The
stark contrast between dreaming and then coming out of the dream into this
experience. I could see the difference between the two. The experience did not
feel dreamlike.
Have you ever shared this experience with others?
Yes
I told a close friend almost immediately after. She shared her OBE with me once
and we'd talk a lot about life and death all the time, so I knew I could bring
it up with her and not be afraid or disbelieved. She's the only one I've talked
to about it though.
Did
you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your
experience?
Yes I've read about it and saw a documentary on TV about it years before. I'm
not sure how that influenced me. It probably helped me not be completely freaked
out by it.
What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to
weeks) after it happened:
Experience was probably real I was confused because I wasn't sure if I'd
actually died at all, but it felt completely real to me.
What do you believe about the reality of your experience at the current time:
Experience was definitely real When I found out that I had sleep apnea it made
much more sense to me. I was sent to a sleep clinic and stayed overnight and
was monitored during the night. I was told that I stop breathing in my sleep
about 60 times an hour, which is very severe sleep apnea.
Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?
No
Have your religious beliefs/spiritual practices changed specifically as a result
of your experience?
Uncertain
Before the experience I was beginning to believe that religion actually gets in
the way of spiritual experiences. This experience seemed to validate that.
At
any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the
experience?
No
Is
there anything else that you would like to add about your experience?
What
was interesting about this is that I was having a dream before it happened and I
seemed to wake out of it into the possible NDE. I could see the stark contrast
between having a dream and this experience. They were nothing alike. It didn't
feel dream-like in any way.
Did
the questions asked and information that you provided accurately and
comprehensively describe your experience?
Yes It seemed pretty thorough.
What could a national organization with an interest in near death experience
(NDE) do that would be of interest to you?
Yes.