Wendy O's Experience
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Experience description:
Around
1:30am I awoke in a cold sweat and felt nauseated. I attempted to walk to the
bathroom and fell unconscious on the floor. I remember being picked up to a
sitting position by my friend. After several minutes of sickness I felt a very
strong sensation in my chest, as if a weight was sitting on my chest. As I lay
in the bed waiting for the ambulance to arrive the entire room suddenly became
white, not like the typical tunnel, but everything, all I could see was white
everywhere. My body felt very light, almost weightless, as if I was leaving my
body. I began to 'see' images from my life, not like the usual way one would
visualize memories, more like really clear pictures from my life. I mostly saw
images of my three children and some of my closest friends from over the years.
During the images I kept switching between the whiteness/images and being in the
room and every time I saw the room I kept telling myself "I'm not going to die."
Then the ambulance arrived and I began trying to focus on the room and what they
were doing to me and the images stopped and I felt my body again and all the
pain... I havent
really had enought time to think through all of it enough to know just how much
it has changed my life....I know I am living my life much more constrained than
I did before....I think more about how my actions effect my physical body. the worst
part has been the pain, the physical restrictions, and still not knowing why I
am still here.
Any associated medications
or substances with the potential to affect the experience?
No
Was the kind of experience
difficult to express in words?
Yes
It is very hard to explain with
words the type of emotions I felt during the experience
At the time of this
experience, was there an associated life threatening event?
Yes
I had an alcohol induced
myocardial infarction
What was your level of
consciousness and alertness during the experience?
I was very aware of what was
happening but I do feel that I was only semi-conscious. I was drifting in and
out of semi-consciousness.
Was the
experience dream like in any way?
Yes, it very much felt like an
awake dream.
Did you experience a
separation of your consciousness from your body?
Uncertain
During the time I felt
weightless I only the white light all around me.
Did you hear any unusual
sounds or noises?
not that I can recall
Did you pass into or through a
tunnel or enclosure?
No
Did you see a light?
Yes
I was surrounded by a white
light, it is all that I could see
Did you meet or see any other
beings? No
Did you experience a review of
past events in your life?
Yes
I began to 'see' images from my
life, not like the usual way one would visualize memories, more like really
clear pictures from my life. I mostly saw images of my three children and some
of my closest friends from over the years.
Did you observe or hear
anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be
verified later? No
Did you see or visit any
beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?
No
Did you have any sense of
altered space or time? No
Did you have a sense of
knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?
No
Did you reach a boundary or
limiting physical structure?
No
Did you become aware of future
events? No
Were you involved in or aware
of a decision regarding your return to the body?
Uncertain
When the ambulance techs
entered the bedroom and started talking and touching me I decided to concentrate
on what they were doing. I had to focus very hard to pay attention and answer
their questions.I was very relieved to see them and felt that I would be okay
now...I didnt feel that sense of dread anymore...
Did you have any psychic,
paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have
prior to the experience?
No
Did you have any changes of
attitudes or beliefs following the experience?
Yes
I am normally a very busy
high-strung type of person but afterwards I am now much more laid back I dont
worry or let everything get to me anymore. I think its more because I realize
now how insignificant the little things in life really are, there are much more
important things to consider in life than menial disagreements and what other
people think.
How has the experience
affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career
choices? I dont feel
as if making lots of money is so important anymore. I feel its more important to
do what makes me happy. I have become more involved in the pagan community in my
area now and I am spending much more time studying than I did before.
Has your life changed
specifically as a result of your experience?
Yes
Have you shared this
experience with others?
No
What emotions did you
experience following your experience?
I was very afraid at first, of not
surviving, having a second, fatal heart attack. I was.....intensely curious
about why I am here and why was I allowed to live.
What was the best and worst
part of your experience?
the best part has been me
re-evaluating what's important in my life, what I want to do, what really makes
me happy.
Is
there anything else you would like to add concerning the experience?
well, I
really just want to know why me?....why did I have a heart attack at 34, with no
warning and why am I still here....its the ever elusive purpose of life question
and I am incredibly curious about it. I feel as if I am still here for a reason
I just havent found the reason yet.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life,
medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?
No
Did
the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively
describe your experience?
Yes