Experience description:

I was a weightless blob of colored light zooming around in open space with other blobs of light playing some kind of game. There was a sense of unity and bliss, laughter and chatter was going on but no words or language was used.

Then I was suddenly alone, I found all the other little light blobs on what I can only describe as some kind of ancient ship... I know it makes no sense.  It was easy to find the others because of sharing 'thoughts'... Everyone else was happy and excited about this journey but I was certain it was a terrible idea and tried to get everyone off the ship, frantically trying to convince them. I finally tried to grab who I could and flee but was repelled back onboard- and then born.  Being in a body was very uncomfortable and limiting.

I tried very hard to talk to other kids about the experience as I grew up, at first I thought I just hadn't learned the correct words. I literally studied to learn vocabulary and so disappointed to figure out that language was not the problem, no body else shared this experience and they thought I was very strange.

In 6th grade I found 'reincarnation' in the encyclopedia in the school library- and was nearly beside myself, thinking now I had the words to express this and somebody would surely understand. However, not only did my teacher not understand or allow me to do my book report on reincarnation, I got sent to the office because I 'didn't seem well'.

So I learned to stop talking about the whole thing, obviously. It was frustrating but as time goes on I'm less and less frustrated.

I imagine that many of the people I come across in life are the other little bits of light and I'm sure there's a larger purpose, as much as I resisted wanting to be here in the first place.

I did try to kill myself when I was 12, and I feel strongly that I did go back to that place before I was born as I did have a near death experience, but I do not remember it at all. When I woke up, I felt much of my frustration and sense that I'm not supposed to be here, a stowaway, was just lifted from me. I have no memory whatsoever though.

I did nearly die in childbirth, requiring a transfusion and having manual removal of a retained placenta without anesthesia - I hovered above my body looking down for that.

And today I have a condition called PPPD, which only developed recently but effects the area of the brain that perceives gravity and balance- and apparently people have reported out of body experiences due to the vertigo of PPPD. I have no idea what the correlation between it all is, if any. I came on the website today to see if anyone else has PPPD (a Neuro vestibular disorder that seems to affect the temporal parietal junction).

Any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?     No     

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?          Yes    it was pre-birth, so I hadn't learned to speak

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event?         No     

What was your level of consciousness and alertness during the experience? a sense of unity, highly alert

            Was the experience dream like in any way?  no, very different from dreaming

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?          Uncertain     I didn't have a body yet.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?         bliss and joy

Did you hear any unusual sounds or noises?         nothing like we would hear with ears.... a sense of laughter and chatter but I can't describe it because we don't have a point of reference

LOCATION DESCRIPTION:  Did you recognize any familiar locations or any locations from familiar religious teachings or encounter any locations inhabited by incredible or amazing creatures?  Uncertain     I like to think that was heaven, but I don't really know

Did you see a light?        Yes    best I can describe, the background was like a very pale slow moving liquid light show, and each 'being' was an amorphous blob of differently colored pastel light

Did you meet or see any other beings?         Yes    each 'being' was an amorphous blob of differently colored pastel light

Did you experiment while out of the body or in another, altered state?          No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          No     

Did you notice how your 5 senses were working, and if so, how were they different?       Yes    there was vision, but touch and sound are without a reference points, and smell and taste I didn't notice

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?  Yes    time? what's that? I still struggle today.

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes    yes, in that there is definitely something more than the physical world, it's very cool, and that we are connected

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?          Yes          OMG I really tried to get back off that boat and go back to just being a blob of light, coming here seems like it was a trick and a really bad idea. But I do think there is a greater purpose that what I could see then, and still see today of course.

Did you become aware of future events?      No     

Were you involved in or aware of a decision regarding your return to the body?          Yes    the whole thing is about me not being very happy about being in a body. I felt like a stowaway because I was just following my playmates and trying to convince them that their journey was at terrible trick and not to come.... here.

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience that you did not have prior to the experience?    Uncertain          some of my friends think I'm very intuitive, but I think I just pay attention to details a little more

Did you have any changes of attitudes or beliefs following the experience? Uncertain     that was the start so I don't think the question counts

How has the experience affected your relationships? Daily life? Religious practices? Career choices? I'm transitioning careers into health and wellbeing, with a program that focuses on increasing wellbeing by increasing one's sense of Unity with a greater whole, I feel that many of my relationships are because I followed my little pod of light blobs into the world that I wasn't interested in coming to in the first place.