Therefore I will only write about the experience itself.

I had for a couple of months begun to seek God and the meaning of life. I researched daily, several hours, on the internet about everything from evolution to theories of creation.

At the point of time when I had my experience I had become more and more convinced that an intelligence laid behind everything that exists in the universe. I was, however, afraid of God, judgment, punishment and eternal doom after death, probably because I under my entire childhood had a father who was a member of Jehovah�s Witnesses who have minted my view on God and religion.

This was a late afternoon in spring, around Mars/April year 2010 and I was located at my middle brother�s house to be a babysitter for his three year old son, as my brother was at a friend�s house. I sat at the computer searching on Google about Christianity and particularly Jesus, as I had been given a speck of hope that I would not be doomed because I didn�t want to be a Jehovah�s Witness. This was because a friend of mine at the Pentecostal church had explained to me that Jesus had already taken the punishment for my past and future sins. I thought this sounded fantastic, but too good to be true. Under my entire uprising I had been given a picture of a harsh and demanding God trough my father.

 I was confused and tired of all the searching and felt genuinely up given because it felt difficult for me to believe in a forgiving God. So I prayed a desperate prayer there at my brother�s house as his child had fallen asleep. I prayed for forgiveness and wisdom. I wanted to know who God really was. Nothing happened and I once again sat down in front of the computer and looked trough some Christian websites and forums, my head was completely empty like a zombie because of all my brooding. After around 20 to 30 minutes I started to feel my feets vibrating. I thought they had just fallen asleep but the vibrations slowly moves from my feets up up trough my calves, knees, and up to my hip before turning around and moving down to the feets again. This was repeated a handful of times but the last times it didn�t stop at my hips but moved upwards to the gut and chest where it stopped and that was when it all really began. From here on it is a bit difficult to explain in words what I experienced but I�ll do my best.

When it reaches my chest it feels like my whole body spasms. I grab the armrests on the chair and my eyes fall shut, I think, or maybe I just lost contact with the world around me. It suddenly felt like an extremely powerful storm of light, warmth, indescribable love and absolute peace fully and literally blows trough my inner being. I become aware of a sort of shapeless light inside my chest that just perfectly screams out love into my body making me I feel almost like I�m going to break.

Here on after it all becomes hard to describe as what I experienced didn�t happen in any particular order or in a linear timeframe. I can at least describe it as good as possible with words and metaphors, even though I perceived all that I describe as happening all at once, independent of time. With my consciousness I fly into my brothers bedroom where his son lies asleep in the large bed. I stroke him across the head with an incredible love inside me that is impossible to describe! Thereafter I float in the nothingness, an infinite, bright emptiness.

What I experience is not visual as we perceive the world with our physical eyes, but it is rather like I am aware of everything and �see� with my heart, which is much clearer! What we call �sight� that we perceive with our eyes is very limited in comparison. I become surprised over the immense peace I am feeling, totally liberated from fear, anguish, worries, stress, brooding, physical pain and discomfort. I just AM

I�m feeling light as a feather. I feel a presence that I afterwards will describe as God. This presence is indescribable and the love I feel overwhelming. If I had felt this in my physical body, in the ordinary physical world, I would have fallen down on the ground and cried out rivers! This presence shows me things and communicates with feelings, not words or telepathy, but feeling is the closest way to describe it! Perfect, ultimate communication!

I feel and become aware of that this love/God has always been with me, every second of my life. Felt my feelings, watched over me and loved me without limit and that it would always be like that! I have nothing to fear! I feel that this God is one with me and I, one with God. I become aware that I consist of God just like everyone else. I had my entire life been subconsciously searching for God, safety and help and I had now became aware that he had always been with me, helped me and had been making sure I made it. This has God done trough other people in my surroundings, spoken to me through the entire creation. God IS everything that exists and communicates with us with the help of absolutely everything. Trough other people, nature, internet, EVERYTHING! I just hadn�t understood it or seen it! Now however it is so clear and logical as I during this moment are in perfect harmony and unity with God.

 I am given visions where I �see� nature, trees, animals and I am aware of every little vein in the trees, every muscle in the animals and I see total perfection and intelligence in everything! In this state there is no doubt that something like randomness does not exist. I AM God! I AM the creation and the whole universe seems so logical and clear! How come that I didn�t realize this earlier! We are all God and of the same spirit. We are all one! Further on I am given a vision of Earth, the size of a basketball where it is positioned one decimeter from my eyes. 

I see like a spiritual veil around earth that somehow prevents people from remembering what they really are! I was now free, outside of my personal bubble and this �veil� around Earth represents a kind of humanities own �bubble�. I see how unaware people are about the fact that they are actually inside God. It feels in this state so absurd that so many people doesn�t even believe in anything more than science and matter, as they pretty much running around in Gods hand (Earth) fighting wars, misbehaves and goes into conflict right in front of Gods face who time after time humbly asks for everyone�s attention just to tell them all magnificent and unconditionally loved they are and that everything is OK. 

I feel the universe as one big consciousness. Gods consciousness. The materia and the physical world is just an illusion! In this state it feels like I have awaken from a dream. This state is knife sharp, strong and bright compared to the physical reality. The physical reality is like a NIGHTMARE in comparison. A DREAM if you were to compare its level of reality.

I am given visions of preachers and churches and feel that it has nothing to do with God at all! These clothe, symbols and buildings are really completely unimportant. This goes for all religions. God has no religion! I understand that there are a little piece of God in all religions but that religions are �contaminated� by human thoughts and feelings. There are no devil or similar. It would be absurd to believe that this God I was now experiencing would allow something like a devil. It is a human invention I realize. Neither are there any punishment or judgment in the afterlife, only wonderful love and light if we just allow ourselves to it. I get to see who God is: simple and unconditional love.

God is not complicated and feelings like anger, jealousy, envy, reprimands, punishment, demands, rules, suspiciousness and �as you make your bed, so will you sleep� is not a part of Gods being. I get to see that life is only about loving everything and everyone, from atoms to blue whales, without any demanding or fear! That is the simple but wonderful purpose and nature with life and God! Just to be and love, not least yourself, unconditionally! But people in the physical world are having it hard to accept this and not least, realize that they themselves are worth all the love in the world. People make their lives complicated and hard trough diversions and fear! God is always with us, every second of our lives, fully dedicated and we are never alone! God is within us all and experience and feel everything that we feel in our lives. God is a state, Love! Every time we commit an act of love against another being that is God working trough us towards� God!

All this I experienced at the same time.

I was then back in my computer chair, stunned.

I wanted to lay down on with my forehead to the floor out of awe for what I had just experienced and felt, but refrained from doing so since I didn�t want to risk that my nephew had woken up, stepped in to the room and found me on the floor as that might have scared him.

I don�t know why I got to experience this since I was not in any way near death or in a coma-like state. Neither was I under the influence of any substance what so ever and I am not suffering from any mental diseases that can play tricks to your brain. Moreover this was so incredibly much more real than what we experience in our everyday lives.  Within 2 years after the experience my chronic and incurable sickness I had carried for a few years faded away.

Love to all of you!

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?       Yes     

There are no words that give this experience justice. No words have the power to describe what I experienced and I can only describe it in a limited and metaphorical way. The state I was in can not be imagined or experienced with our physical brain/senses. I would never have been able to imagine anything near this before the experience. To explain it is like explaining what a color look like to someone who has been blind since birth.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No     

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?     

I can�t describe when as I didn�t experience any time but I could say that it was from when I lost the perception of my surroundings and my physical body.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?   More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:        I can�t describe when as I didn�t experience any time but I could say that it was from when I lost the perception of my surroundings and my physical body.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?   Yes

What I experienced was that I �saw� everything from the inside. As if I was a part of everything. I was aware of everything rather than saw everything. I had visions of trees and animals where I could see and feel everything that was inside these and how they were constructed. It was really sharp! Colors, contours, everything was knife sharp and bright and it was as if I had been given a new very powerful sense. It was not visual. I more like felt and was aware of everything inside me and what we see with our eyes in our physical bodies is very limited in comparison.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?        Uncertain       I didn�t hear any sounds at all. It would just be unnecessary as I was aware of everything. An awareness that doesn�t need sound

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?   Uncertain

What emotions did you feel during the experience?   

I felt completely free, peaceful, infinitely loved. I had no fears what so ever. I couldn�t even imagine the pain, fear, stress etc. that we feel daily in our bodies. It was an incredible love and peace I was feeling all the way in to my most inner being. I was as if disconnected to my body and its feelings, but never saw my body from the outside.  Therefore I don�t know if I actually did leave the body but I had a vision where I moved up to my nephew, who I was babysitting, and stroked him over the head with an incredible love inside me. I have no memory of seeing my hand while doing this. I also had a vision where I found myself above the building where my brother lives.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?     No     

Did you see a light?    Yes     

Rather than seeing a light I felt and was aware of an amazing light that traveled through my inner being. A spiritual light.

Did you meet or see any other beings?   Yes     

I didn�t see any being visually, neither could I distinguish shapes of any �light being� or similar. Rather, I felt a presence that rushed through my inner being and this presence communicated with me through feeling. Not words, not even words by telepathy. It was through feelings that said more than words. I, at the time, thought of it as Jesus or God but felt afterwards that God is EVERYONE. No names were �expressed� that identified the presence. It felt more like it was the entire universe that communicated with me, but I choose to say God. God let me feel that he loved me beyond description and that he had always been with me, every second of my life. He let me know that he had always spoken to me through other people in my surroundings, through the internet, he can communicate with us through absolutely anything in the creation because he IS everything, he is one with us and we humans are one with him.

 It was like he took my hand and said: �I am here, I really do exist, I love you so incredibly much. I have always been with you and will always be with you. Remember that from now on.�

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?        No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?        No   

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?    Uncertain       

I had �visions� about nature, animals etc. where I could see every little vein inside all plants and animals, but I can�t tell if I was in another dimension. However it felt like I saw the physical universe from another dimension that allowed me to see that the universe was God and spiritual. Like a big consciousness rather than matter. Materia is like an illusion. I floated in to another dimension that had nothing to do with this universe, or more like, I felt like I actually was the universe and everything seemed so logical!

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?        Yes      I didn�t feel any time at all, instead, everything just �was�. Everything just IS! Neither did I feel bound to a point in space-time but felt as I was one with everything and aware of exactly what I wanted to be aware of. A drop of water had been united with the ocean and had become one with it.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?      Yes    

I realized that God is absolutely everything. God is everyone and works through us all. He is life and existence in general. Nothing exists that is separated from God. I realized that God is only love, totally uncomplicated and completely unconditionally. God loves absolutely everything that exists and feelings such as wrath, judgment, demands, punishment, jealousness and envy is not in Gods being at all. I also realized that there is no evil opposite to god such as �Satan� or the devil. I became aware that life on earth is about LOVING everything and everyone in the creation including yourself. Nothing else! That is the only so simple but so wonderful truth, but this is so hard for us humans to understand when we are in our bodies. We humans make everything so complicated and we are not able to feel ourselves worthy who God really is. The human believes this is �too good to be true� and therefor has to take complicated and difficult detours in life which makes it harder than what it needs to be.  I learned that our religions has a tiny bit of God in them, but are contaminated by human thoughts and feelings which makes people misunderstand God and can if things goes bad become afraid. There is no �right� way to God and no religion has a monopoly on God. I afterwards received knowledge about how humans may misunderstand God. For example, when Jesus said �Love thy neighbor and God� many people interprets that as a demand or a condition for God�s love rather than as a promise. Because actually, when you have witnessed God then you can�t do anything but love �him� and your neighbor, as you have seen how wonderful god really is.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?        No     

Did you become aware of future events?  No     

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?  Yes    

After the experience I am able to �bring up� divine love for absolutely anyone, even the most hated person. I have greater understanding for other people and because of that even greater forgiveness. I don�t view everything as black and white. I am able to induce love for myself that feels like warm shivers in my whole physical body. I can also speak some form of tounge where I also feel this love and these shivers in my body, with a feeling of peace afterwards.

Have you shared this experience with others?    Yes

I told about this experience the same evening for a christian friend that couldn�t really explain what i had experienced. He believed me and thought it sounded amazing. I told it a few days later to 2 of my 3 brothers and my mother. Everyone of them had since earlier had a more or less profound belief that there is some sort of �God� or higher power. They believed in what I said but had it difficult to really comperhend it. At some points they wondered if I maybe had been hallucinating. Since then they seem to have been able to process what I told them and respect it. I have since then been given some sort of position as a spiritual oracle and advisor for some people in my family, even though it feels a little silly to say it that way, haha. I also told my father about my experience the day after it happened. He is a Jehovas Witness and seemed interested in what had happened, but warned me for that �Satan can show himself in the shape of light and mislead people that way. But I knew that it wasn�t that way and that no such thing at Satan existed!

He didn�t ask me any more about it, but at a later time I often questioned his and Jehovas witnesses, in my opinion, loveless belief, (as it took some time for me to dare letting go of Christianity) and it ended up in hot debate every time until I realized that there is no reason to argue about it. I think that everyone should believe what they want if it makes them happy, even if it does NOT make them happy. I feel today that the best thing is to live your life in unconditional love towards everyone, regardless of belief or background and thereby make a nice example out of your life. It is hard for a human to realize just how unconditionally loving God really is, if you have not experienced what I and thousands of others have experienced in this highly �supernatural� way.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?     Yes

I had read a little about it on the internet, but soon became afraid of them as I also could read at Christian forums about this phenomena where they warned for �Satan in the shape of light� I kept myself away from it because of the eventual consequences and fear of God but still I felt a draw and an interest to the phenomena as God seemed so wonderful out from what I had read about NDEs

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:      Experience was definitely real  The experience felt profoundly more real and sharper than this reality we are in when on this physical earth in our physical bodies. It was like waking up from a dream! A few days afterwards I even felt a bit depressed and lost as I felt alone in having received this knowledge, amongst all the people around me. Alone amongst so many �sleeping� people! The only thing I wanted was to get �home to god� and the love where I felt I belonged but this faded after a while and I found my way back to the everyday world.  3 months later I got a daughter and life continued in full speed. Today I have read about a lot of other similar experiences and I recognize so much in them, which confirms the reality of my experience even more.

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?  

What meant the most to me and that changed my view on life, is when I was given the knowledge that I am so incredibly loved just for whom I am and that I never need to fear God. Of everything that is to be feared in this world God is not one of those things. I felt so relieved and uplifted because of this and the knowledge that I am never really alone. I had felt alone and misunderstood my entire life before this experience.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:       Experience was definitely real  

I have grown a great bit spiritually during the two years that have passed and I realize more and more that everything really works the way I understood it in the experience. Also the fact that I can relate so well to other peoples similar experiences, confirms even more that what I experienced really happened, even though it still today feels like a very strange and swirling experience.

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?    Yes    

I have changed a lot as a person and my priorities and interests in life have also changed. My destructive living disappeared quickly and I no longer feel an interest of staying in contact with some of my old friends as I no longer feel that I have anything in common with them. Friends has left and new ones has arrived!

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?      Yes 

I am no longer religious. I am spiritual, liberal and have a personal relationship to God and the spiritual. I feel inside me what Is right for me. There are some good parts in all religions but I am not attached to any of them. I am more interested in what other people who have had NDEs experienced.
Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?    No             

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?    Yes     

At the moment I am happy with what I have written. I will surely come up with more later that I want to share because I feel that I grow in a raging speed spiritually and learn more about life

Are there any other questions we could ask to help you communicate your experience?    

I think you have done a great job!

EXPERIENCE DESCRIPTION:

Egentligen skulle jag vilja ber�tta om hela mitt liv fram till min upplevelse och �ven om tiden efter upplevelsen fram till detta nu, d� allt h�nger ihop. Men d� f�r jag nog skriva en hel bok!

S� d�rf�r skriver jag nu enbart om sj�lva upplevelsen.

Jag hade i n�gra m�nader b�rjat s�ka Gud och mening med livet. Jag forskade dagligen, flera timmar, p� internet om allt fr�n evolution till skapelseteorier.

Men vid denna tidpunkt d� jag hade min upplevelse s� hade jag blivit mer och mer �vertygad om att en intelligens l�g bakom allt som existerar i universum. Jag var dock r�dd f�r Gud, f�rd�mande, straff och evig underg�ng efter d�den. F�rmodligen

mycket p.g.a att jag under hela min uppv�xt haft en pappa som �r med i Jehovas vittnen som har pr�glat min syn p� Gud och religion.

Detta var en sen eftermiddag p� v�ren, i Mars/April �r 2010 och jag befann mig hemma hos min mellanbror f�r att vara barnvakt �t hans, d� tre�rige son, d� min bror var hemma hos en v�n. Jag satt vid datorn och googlade om kristendom och framf�r allt Jesus, d� jag f�tt en gnutta hopp om att inte vara f�rd�md p.g.a att jag inte ville vara ett Jehovas vittne, d� en v�n fr�n Pingstkyrkan f�rklarade f�r mig att Jesus redan har tagit straffet f�r mina beg�ngna och framtida synder. Detta l�t fantastiskt tyckte jag, men f�r bra f�r att vara sant, d� jag under hela min uppv�xt f�tt en bild av en str�ng och kr�vande Gud via min pappa. S� jag var f�rvirrad och tr�tt p� allt s�kande och k�nde mig genuint uppgiven d� jag k�nde att det var s� sv�rt att tro p� en f�rl�tande Gud. S� jag bad en desperat b�n d�r hemma hos min bror d� hans son hade somnat. Jag bad om f�rst�else och visshet! Jag ville veta vem Gud egentligen var! Inget h�nde och jag satte mig �terigen framf�r datorn och stirrade igenom n�gra kristna hemsidor och forum, alldeles tom i huvudet som en zombie p.g.a allt grubblande. Efter ca 20-30 minuter s� k�nner jag att det b�rjar vibrera i f�tterna. jag t�nker att dom har v�l somnat. Men vibrationerna letar sig l�ngsamt upp fr�n f�tterna, genom vaderna, kn�na, l�ren och upp i h�ften f�r att sedan v�nda om och l�ngsamt leta sig ner igen till f�tterna. Detta upprepade sig en handfull g�nger, men den sista g�ngen s� stannade det inte vid h�fterna utan fortsatte upp i magen och br�stet d�r det stannade och det var d� det verkligen b�rjade p� allvar! H�rifr�n �r det lite sv�rt att beskriva i ord vad jag upplevde, men jag ska g�ra mitt b�sta.

N�r det n�r br�stet s� �r det som att jag krampar till i hela kroppen och greppar tag h�rt i armst�den p� datorstolen och mina �gon st�ngs. Tror jag. Eller s� tappade helt enkelt bara kontakten med det som h�nde runt omkring mig. Det k�nns pl�tsligt som att en oerh�rt kraftig storm av ljus, v�rme, obeskrivlig k�rlek och vidunderlig frid fullkomligt och bokstavligt bl�ser genom mitt innersta v�sen och jag blir medveten om ett slags forml�st ljus som befinner sig i mitt br�st och fullkomligt vr�lar ut k�rlek i min mage s� jag n�stan tror jag ska spricka! H�refter blir det sv�rbeskrivligt d� det jag nu kommer beskriva inte h�nde i n�gon speciell ordning i en linj�r tid, men jag kan �tminstone beskriva det s� gott det g�r med ord och metaforer, �ven om jag upplevde allt jag beskriver som att det h�nde p� en och samma g�ng, ej beroende av tid! Med mitt medvetande �flyger� jag in till min brors sovrum d�r hans son l�g och sov i den stora dubbels�ngen. Jag stryker honom �ver huvudet med en enorm k�rlek inom mig som inte g�r att beskriva! d�refter sv�var jag i intet, ett o�ndligt och ljust tomrum. Det jag upplever �r inte visuellt som vi upplever v�rlden med v�ra fysiska �gon, utan det �r snarare som att jag �r medveten om allt och �ser� med mitt hj�rta, vilket �r betydligt skarpare! Det vi kallar f�r �syn� som vi upplever med v�ra �gon �r v�ldigt begr�nsat i j�mf�relse. Jag blir f�rv�nad �ver den otroliga frid jag k�nner. Totalt befriad fr�n r�dsla, �ngest, oro, stress, grubbleri och fysisk sm�rta och kroppsligt obehag. Jag bara �R! Jag k�nner mig l�tt som en fj�der. Jag k�nner en n�rvaro som jag i efterhand beskriver som Gud. Denna n�rvaro �r obeskrivlig och k�rleken jag k�nner �r �verv�ldigande och om jag skulle uppleva den i min fysiska kropp, i denna fysiska v�rld i vardagen s� skulle jag antagligen falla ihop platt p� marken och gr�ta floder! Denna n�rvaro visar mig saker och ting och kommunicerar med k�nslor. Inte med ord eller telepati, utan k�nslor �r det n�rmsta jag kan beskriva det! Perfekt, ultimat kommunikation! Jag k�nner och blir medveten om att denna k�rlek/Gud alltid har varit med mig, varenda sekund av mitt liv. K�nt mina k�nslor, vakat �ver mig och �lskat mig vidunderligt och att det alltid skulle vara s�! Jag har inget att frukta! Jag k�nner att denna Gud �r ett med mig och jag, ett med Gud. Jag blir medveten om att jag best�r utav Gud precis om alla andra. Jag hade hela mitt liv undermedvetet s�kt efter Gud, trygghet och hj�lp och jag blir nu medveten om att han alltid hade varit med mig, hj�lpt mig och sett till att jag klarat mig. Detta har denna Gud gjort genom andra m�nniskor i min omgivning, talat till mig genom hela skapelsen! Gud �R allt som existerar och kommunicerar med oss med hj�lp av precis vad som helst. Genom andra m�nniskor, genom naturen, genom internet, ALLT! Jag hade bara inte f�rst�tt eller sett det! Men nu �r det s� tydligt och logiskt d� jag i detta tillst�nd �r i perfekt harmoni och enhet med Gud. Jag f�r visioner d�r jag f�r �se� natur, tr�d, djur och jag �r medveten om varenda lite �der i tr�den, varenda muskelf�ste i djuren och jag ser total perfektion och intelligens i allt! I detta tillst�nd r�der det ingen tvekan om att n�got som slumpen inte existerar. Jag �R Gud! Jag �R skapelsen och hela universum verkar s� logiskt och klart! Att jag inte f�rst�tt allt detta tidigare! Vi �r alla Gud och av samma ande. Vi h�r ihop! Vidare f�r jag en vision av jorden, stor som en basketboll d� den befinner sig en decimeter fr�n �gonen. Jag ser som en andlig hinna runt hela jorden som p� n�got s�tt hindrar m�nniskor fr�n att komma ih�g vad dom faktiskt �r! Jag var nu fri, ute ur min personliga bubbla och denna �hinna� runt jorden representerar en slags m�nsklighetens kollektiva �bubbla�. Jag ser hur omedvetna m�nniskor �r om att dom faktiskt befinner sig I Gud. Det k�nns i detta tillst�nd s� absurt att m�nga av dom inte ens tror p� n�got mer �n vetenskap och materia, d� dom i princip springer runt i Guds hand (jorden) och krigar och beter sig och br�kar framf�r n�san p� Gud som g�ng p� g�ng �dmjukt ber alla om uppm�rksamhet f�r att bara f� tala om f�r dom hur magnifika och villkorsl�st �lskade dom �r och att allt �r OK. Jag f�r k�nslan av universum som ett stort medvetande. Guds medvetande. Materien och den fysiska v�rlden �r bara en illusion! I detta tillst�nd k�nns det som att jag vaknat upp ur en dr�m. Detta tillst�nd �r knivskarpt, starkt och ljust i j�mf�relse med den fysiska verkligheten. Den fysiska verkligheten �r som en MARDR�M i j�mf�relse. En DR�M om man ska j�mf�ra verklighetsgrad! Jag f�r visioner av pr�ster och kyrkor k�nner att det inte har n�got med Gud att g�ra alls! Dessa kl�der, symboler och byggnader �r egentligen helt oviktiga. Det g�ller alla religioner. Gud har ingen religion! Jag f�rst�r att det finns en gnutta Gud i alla religioner men att religioner �r �nedsmutsade� av m�nskliga tankar och k�nslor. Inte heller finns det n�gon Dj�vul eller liknande. Det vore absurt att tro att denna Gud jag nu upplevde skulle till�ta n�got s�dant som en Dj�vul! Det �r ett m�nskligt p�fund inser jag. Inte heller finns det straff eller dom i livet efter detta. Bara underbar k�rlek och ljus om vi bara till�ter oss det! Jag f�r se vem Gud �r och det �r simpel och villkorsl�s k�rlek. Gud �r inte komplicerad och k�nslor som vrede, svartsjuka, missunnsamhet, tillr�ttavisning, straff, krav, regler, misst�nksamhet, och �som man b�ddar f�r man ligga� tillh�r inte Guds v�sen. Jag f�r se att livet enbart g�r ut p� att �lska allt och alla, fr�n atomer till bl�valar, helt utan villkor och r�dsla! Det �r den simpla men underbara meningen och naturen med livet och Gud! Att bara vara och att �lska. Inte minst sig sj�lv! Villkorsl�st! Men m�nniskor i den fysiska verkligheten har sv�rt att acceptera detta och inte minst, inse att dom �r v�rda all k�rlek i v�rlden. M�nniskor g�r d�rf�r livet kr�ngligt och sv�rt med omv�gar och r�dsla! Gud �r alltid med oss, varenda sekund av v�ra liv, fullkomligt engagerad och vi �r aldrig ensamma! Gud finns inom oss alla och upplever och k�nner allt det vi k�nner i v�ra liv. Gud �r ett tillst�nd! K�rlek! Varenda g�ng vi utf�r en k�rlekshandling mot en annan m�nniska s� �r det Gud som verkar genom oss mot.. Gud!

Allt detta upplevde jag samtidigt.

Jag var sedan tillbaka i datorstolen f�rstummad.

Jag ville l�gga mig ner p� golvet med pannan mot golvet av v�rdnad f�r det jag precis hade upplevt och k�nt, men avstod fr�n det d� jag inte ville riskera att min brorson hade vaknat och d�refter kanske kommit in i rummet jag befann mig i och funnit mig p� golvet, d� det kanske hade skr�mt honom.

Jag vet inte varf�r jag fick uppleva detta eftersom jag inte p� n�got s�tt var n�ra d�den eller i n�got koma-liknande tillst�nd. Inte heller var jag p�verkad av n�gon som helst substans och jag lider inte av n�gra psykiska sjukdomar som kan spela spratt med hj�rnan. Dessutom var detta s� otroligt mycket verkligare �n det vi upplever p� jorden i v�r vardag. Inom 2 �r efter upplevelsen f�rsvann �ven sakta men s�kert min obotliga och kroniska sjukdom jag burit p� i n�gra �r.

K�rlek till er!

Was the kind of experience difficult to express in words?       Yes     Det finns inga ord som ger upplevelse r�ttvisa. Inga ord har styrkan att beskriva det jag upplevde och jag kan bara beskriva det begr�nsat och metaforiskt. Det tillst�nd jag befann mig i kan ej f�rest�llas eller upplevas med v�ra fysiska sinnen/hj�rna som vi anv�nder i denna fysiska verklighet. Jag hade aldrig kunnat f�rest�lla mig n�got liknande innan denna upplevelse. Att f�rklara den �r som att f�rklara hur en f�rg ser ut f�r en m�nniska som varit blind sedan f�dseln.

At the time of this experience, was there an associated life threatening event? No     

At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness?       Jag kan inte beskriva n�r d� jag inte upplevde n�gon tid. Men jag f�r v�l lov att s�ga det var from d� jag tappade uppfattningen av min omgivning och av min fysiska kropp.

How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal every day consciousness and alertness?   More consciousness and alertness than normal

If your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience was different from your normal every day consciousness and alertness, please explain:        Jag kan inte beskriva n�r d� jag inte upplevde n�gon tid. Men jag f�r v�l lov att s�ga det var from d� jag tappade uppfattningen av min omgivning och av min fysiska kropp.

Did your vision differ in any way from your normal, everyday vision (in any aspect, such as clarity, field of vision, colors, brightness, depth perception degree of solidness/transparency of objects, etc.)?  Yes     Det jag upplevde var att �s�g� allt inifr�n. Som att jag var en del av allt. Jag var medveten om allt snarare �n att jag s�g allt. Jag hade visioner av tr�d och djur d�r jag kunde se och k�nna allt som fanns inuti dessa och hur dom var uppbyggda. Det var verkligen knivskarpt! F�rger, konturer, allt var knivskarpt och ljust och det var som om jag f�tt ett nytt v�ldigt kraftfullt sinne. Det var inte visuellt. Jag snarare k�nde och var medveten om allt inom mig och det vi ser med v�ra �gon i v�ra fysiska kroppar �r v�ldigt begr�nsat i j�mf�relse.

Did your hearing differ in any way from your normal, everyday hearing (in any aspect, such as clarity, ability to recognize source of sound, pitch, loudness, etc.)?
        Uncertain       Jag upplevde inga ljud alls. Det vore bara �verfl�digt d� jag var medveten om allt. En medvetenhet som inte beh�ver ljud.

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?   Uncertain

What emotions did you feel during the experience?       Jag k�nde mig totalt fri, fridfull, o�ndligt �lskad. Jag hade inga r�dslor alls. Jag kunde inte ens f�rest�lla mig den sm�rta, r�dsla, stress osv. som vi k�nner dagligen i v�ra kroppar. Det var en vidunderlig frid och k�rlek jag k�nde �nda in i mitt absolut innersta. Jag var som bortkopplad fr�n min kropp och dess k�nslor, men s�g aldrig min kropp utifr�n. D�rf�r vet jag inte om jag faktiskt l�mnade kroppen. Men fick en vision d�r jag r�rde mig in till min brors son som jag var barnvakt �t, och str�k honom p� huvudet med en vidunderlig k�rlek inom mig. Jag har inget minne av att jag s�g min hand d� jag gjorde detta. Jag hade �ven visioner d�r jag befann mig ovanf�r h�ghuset d�r min bror bor.

Did you pass into or through a tunnel or enclosure?     No     

Did you see a light?    Yes     Snarare �n att jag s�g ett ljus s� k�nde jag och var medveten om ett fantastiskt ljus som tr�ngde igenom mitt innersta. Ett andligt ljus.

Did you meet or see any other beings?   Yes     Jag s�g ingen varelse rent visuellt, jag kunde inte heller urskilja konturer av n�gon �ljusvarelse� eller liknande. Jag k�nde snarare en n�rvaro som stormade genom mitt innersta och denna n�rvaro kommunicerade till mig genom k�nslor. Inte ord eller ens ord via telepati. Det var genom k�nslor som sade mer �n ord. Jag upplevde det d� som Jesus eller Gud. Men k�nde efter�t att Gud �r ALLA. Inga namn �uttalades� som identifierade n�rvaron. Det k�ndes snarare som om det var universum som kommunicerade med mig, men jag v�ljer att s�ga Gud. Gud l�t mig k�nna att han �lskade mig obeskrivligt mkt och att han alltid har varit med mig, varenda sekund av mitt liv. Han l�t mig k�nna att han alltid talat till mig via andra m�nniskor i min omgivning, genom internet, ja han kan kommunicera genom precis allt som finns i skapelsen eftersom att han �R allt och han �r ett med oss och vi m�nniskor �r ett med honom. Han finns i oss alla. Det var som att han tog min hand och sade: �H�r �r jag, jag finns verkligen och jag �lskar dig s� otroligt och jag har alltid varit med dig och kommer alltid vara med dig. Kom ih�g det fr�n och med nu�.

Did you experience a review of past events in your life?        No     

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?        No     

Did you see or visit any beautiful or otherwise distinctive locations, levels or dimensions?    Uncertain       Jag hade �visioner� med natur, djur osv. d�r jag kunde se varenda liten �der inuti alla v�xter och djur. Jag hade �visioner� d�r jag s�g jorden och m�nskligheten, men kan inte svara p� om jag var i en annan dimension. Men det k�ndes som att jag s�g det fysiska universum utifr�n en annan dimension som l�t mig se att universum var Gud och andligt. Som ett stort medvetande snarare �n materia. Materia �r som en illusion. Men jag gled aldrig in helt och h�llet i en annan dimension som inte hade med detta universum att g�ra. jag k�nde snarare som att jag faktiskt var universum och allt verkade s� logiskt!

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?        Yes     Jag k�nde inte av n�gon tid alls utan allt bara �var�. Allt bara �R! Jag k�nde mig inte heller bunden till en punkt i rumtid, utan k�nde mig som att jag var ett med allt och var medveten om precis det jag ville vara medveten om. En droppe som �terf�renats med ett stort hav och blivit en del av dess helhet.

Did you have a sense of knowing special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?      Yes     Jag fick veta att Gud �r precis allt. Gud �r oss alla och verkar genom oss alla. Han �r livet och existens i allm�nhet. Inget existerar �tskiljt fr�n Gud. Jag fick veta att Gud enbart �r k�rlek, totalt okomplicerad och totalt utan villkor. Gud �lskar precis allt som existerar och k�nslor som vrede, d�mande, krav, straff, svartsjuka, tillr�ttavisning, misst�nksamhet, missunnsamhet,om och men, finns inte i Guds v�sen alls! Jag f�rstod ox� att det inte finns n�gon ond motpol till Gud, s�som �Satan� eller dj�vulen. Jag fick veta att livet p� jorden g�r ut p� att �LSKA allt och alla i skapelsen inklusive sig sj�lv. Inget annat! Det �r den enda simpla men s� underbara meningen med livet, men som �r s� sv�rt att f�rst� f�r oss m�nniskor d� vi �r i v�ra kroppar. Vi m�nniskor g�r allt s� komplicerat och vi kan inte k�nna oss v�rdiga den Gud faktiskt �r. M�nniskan tror att det �r �f�r bra f�r att vara sant� och m�ste d�rf�r ta knepiga och sv�ra omv�gar i livet vilket g�r det betydligt sv�rare �n det beh�ver vara. Jag l�rde mig att v�ra religioner har en gnutta Gud i sig, men �r nedsmutsade av m�nskliga tankar och k�nslor vilket g�r att m�nniskan missf�rst�r Gud och kan bli r�dd  i v�rsta fall. Det finns ingen �r�tt� v�g till Gud och ingen religion har monopol p� Gud. Jag fick efter�t kunskap och exempel om hur m�nnskan kan missuppfatta Gud. T.ex d�r Jesus s�ger att �du skall �lska din Gud och din n�ste� s� tar m�nga m�nniskor det som ett krav eller villkor f�r Guds k�rlek d� det snarare �r ett l�fte. N�mligen, d� du har sett Gud s� kan du inte g�ra annat �n att �lska �honom� och din n�ste, d� man har f�tt uppleva hur underbar Gud verkligen �r.

Did you reach a boundary or limiting physical structure?        No     

Did you become aware of future events?  No     

Did you have any psychic, paranormal or other special gifts following the experience you did not have prior to the experience?  Yes     Jag kan efter upplevelsen �plocka fram� Gudomlig k�rlek f�r precis vem som helst. �ven den mest avskydde m�nniskan. Jag har st�rre f�rst�else f�r andra m�nniskor och d�rav �ven mer f�rl�tande. Jag ser inte allt svart p� vitt. Jag kan framkalla k�rlek till mig sj�lv som k�nns som varma rysningar i hela min kropp som k�nns helande b�de f�r sj�len och f�r min fysiska kropp. Jag kan �ven tala n�gon form av tungom�l d�r jag �ven k�nner denna k�rlek och dessa rysningar i kroppen, med en k�nsla av frid efter�t.

Have you shared this experience with others?    Yes     Jag ber�ttade om denna upplevelse f�rst och fr�mst samma dag p� kv�llen f�r en kristen v�n som inte riktigt kunde f�rklara vad jag hade upplevt. Han trodde p� mig och tyckte att det l�t fantastiskt. Jag ber�ttade det n�gra dagar senare f�r 2 utav mina 3 br�der samt min mamma. Alla hade sen tidigare n�gon mer eller mindre stark tro p� att det finns n�n slags �Gud� eller h�gre krafter. Dom trodde p� det jag sade men har sv�rt att ta in det. Vid vissa tillf�llen undrade dom om jag kanske hade haft hallucinationer. Sedan dess s� verkar dom ha kunnat sm�lta det jag ber�ttat och respekterar det. Jag har sedan dess f�tt n�gon slags liten roll som andligt orakel och r�dgivare f�r vissa i familjen, �ven om jag tycker det k�nns lite fjantigt att uttrycka det s� haha. Jag ber�ttade �ven om upplevelsen f�r min pappa dagen efter upplevelsen. Han �r ju ett Jehovas vittne och verkade intresserad av det som h�nt och tyckte det l�t fantastiskt, men varnade mig f�r att �Satan kan visa sig i ljusets skepnad� och vilseleda m�nniskor p� det h�r viset. Men jag visste att det inte var p� det viset, Jag var ju �vertygad om att n�gon Satan inte ens existerar! Han fr�gade inte mer om det, men en tid efter�t ifr�gasatte jag ofta hans och Jehovas vittnens, enligt mig, k�rleksl�sa tro (d� det tog lite tid f�r mig att v�ga sl�ppa taget om kristendomen) och heta diskussioner uppstod varje g�ng tills jag ins�g att det inte �r n�gon id� att br�ka om det. Jag l�rde mig snabbt att deras tro inte �r mitt problem och att man inte ska sl�sa energi p� s�nt. Jag anser att alla f�r tro p� vad dom vill om det g�r dom lyckliga. �ven om det INTE g�r dom lyckliga. Jag k�nner idag att det b�sta �r att leva sitt liv i villkorsl�s k�rlek mot alla, oavsett tro och bakgrund, och d�rmed g�ra ett fint exempel av sitt liv. Det �r sv�rt f�r m�nniskan att inse hur villkorsl�st k�rleksfull Gud verkligen �r, om man inte sj�lv f�tt uppleva det som jag och tusentals andra m�nniskor upplevt p� detta h�gst ��vernaturliga� s�tt.

Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience?     Yes     Jag hade l�st lite om det p� internet, men snabbt blivit skr�md av dom d� jag samtidigt kunde l�sa p� kristna forum om detta fenomen d�r man varnade just f�r �Satan i ljusets skepnad�. Jag h�ll mig undan fr�n det, pga eventuella konsekvenser och av r�dsla f�r Gud. Men jag k�nde fortfarande en dragning och intresse f�r fenomenet d� Gud verkade s� underbar utifr�n vad jag hade l�st om NDUs

How did you view the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened:      Experience was definitely real  Upplevelsen k�ndes betydligt verkligare och skarpare �n denna verklighet vi befinner oss i p� denna fysiska jord i v�ra fysiska kroppar. Som att vakna upp ur en dr�m! N�gra dagar efter�t var jag t.o.m lite deprimerad och vilsen d� jag k�nde mig ensam om att f�tt ta emot denna nya omskakande vetskap, bland alla m�nniskor jag k�nde. Ensam bland massa �sovande� m�nniskor! Jag ville bara tillbaka �hem till Gud� och k�rleken d�r jag k�nde att jag h�rde hemma. Men det sl�ppte efter ett tag och jag hittade tillbaka till vardagen, och ca 3 m�n senare fick jag en dotter och livet fortsatte i full fart. Idag har jag l�st massor om m�nga andra liknande upplevelser och k�nner igen mig s� mkt i dom, vilket bekr�ftar dess verklighet ytterligare f�r mig!

Were there one or several parts of the experience especially meaningful or significant to you?  Det som betydde mest f�r mig och som har �ndrat min syn p� livet, �r d� jag fick veta att jag �r s� otroligt �lskad precis f�r den jag �r och att jag aldrig beh�ver k�nna mig r�dd f�r Gud. Av allt som finns att frukta i v�rlden s� tillh�r inte Gud detta allt. Jag k�nde mig s� otroligt l�ttad och upprymd �ver detta och av vetskapen om att jag aldrig egentligen �r ensam! Jag hade k�nt mig ensam och of�rst�dd genom hela mitt liv fram till denna upplevelse.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience:       Experience was definitely real  Jag har vuxit rej�lt andligen under dom tv� �r som passerat och f�rst�r mer och mer att allt verkligen fungerar som jag f�rstod i upplevelsen. Sen det faktum att jag k�nner igen mig s� v�l i andra m�nniskors liknande upplevelser, bekr�ftar ytterligare att det jag upplevde verkligen h�nde. �ven om det fortfarande idag k�nns som en v�ldigt m�rklig och omskakande upplevelse!

Have your relationships changed specifically as a result of your experience?    Yes     Jag har f�r�ndrats mkt som m�nniska och f�tt andra prioriteringar och intressen i livet. mitt destruktiva leverne avtog snabbt och jag k�nner inte l�ngre intresse av att umg�s med en vissa gamla v�nner d� jag idag inte k�nner att jag har n�got gemensamt med dom l�ngre. v�nner har f�rsvunnit och nya har dykt upp!

Have your religious beliefs/practices changed specifically as a result of your experience?      Yes     Jag �r inte l�ngre religi�s. Jag �r andlig och liberal och har en personlig relation till Gud och det andliga. Jag k�nner inom mig vad som �r r�tt f�r mig. Det finns vissa �gobitar� i alla religioner men jag �r inte f�st vid n�gon av dom. Jag �r mer intresserad av vad andra �NDUare� ber�ttar om sina upplevelser.

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?    No             

Did the questions asked and information you provided so far accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?    Yes     Just nu �r jag n�jd med det jag har sagt. Sen kommer det s�kert dyka upp mer jag vill dela med mig av eftersom jag k�nner att jag v�xer i rasande takt rent andligt och l�r mig mer och mer av livet!

Are there any other questions we could ask to help you communicate your experience?     Jag tycker att ni har gjort ett bra jobb!