I was suffering with severe bouts of anxiety, and I was really living in a horrible time in my life.

I was living in terror, with no real cause to be. I had a great family and home.

This particular night my anxiety was beating me down, I just wanted to lay down and try to sleep.

My Husband was already asleep and I quietly pulled the blinds, shut the door and slide into bed.

The entire household was asleep, and quiet. I laid in bed and once again my mind was still going, thinking about all the things I need to do the next day, I remember thinking "God, I can not stand feeling so much irrational fear"

I remember tossing and turning several times over the course of 10-15 minutes.

At one point, I had my back to the room and was facing the wall. I had this feeling that one of my children were standing at the side of the bed, waiting for me to ask them what they need. I knew it was impossible because I would have heard the door open when they came in. But I still rolled over on my back and lifted my body up with my elbows. I looked and no, no child was next to the bed. But I still had this feeling like someone was next to me. I was about to lie down flat on my back again, when I had this enormous burst of light go off in front of my face, it was like someone took a picture of me at a foot away from my face in the dark using a flash.

I remember hearing a whooshing noise as the flash was ending. It sounded like a Polaroid camera does after you take a picture. This all occurred in maybe three seconds. The flash seemed to suck back up into a little ball like the size of a marble and zoom out the bedroom window right next to me. I also remember being like flash blinded for a few moments after. I froze for about 10 seconds and turned to my Husband and yelled out his name. He woke and sad 'what?" I said what was that? he was clueless he was sleeping. I got up out of bed and flipped on the light, I opened the door and went into the kitchen and just stood there rocking back and fourth for a minute trying to comprehend what I just saw. I was stunned, I knew what I saw and that this was very real and no dream. My Husband followed me in the kitchen but saw nothing.

Sometimes, I doubt the paranormal but then I think back to that night, and I tell myself, no there is definitely something else going on in this universe.

I have had experiences through my life, but this was the most dramatic and profound thing I ever witnessed.

I am telling this story after reading another story here, that is very identical to mine. When I read that story I actually felt cold and shocked. Because once again it's reassurance that this was the real thing. I have no idea what this was, but I felt the presence before it flashed. I think it was some type of spirit there helping me through a hard time in life.

Was this experience difficult to express in words?  No

Did you ONLY sense an awareness of presence of the deceased without actually seeing, hearing, feeling or smelling them?            No

Did you hear the deceased or hear something associated with the deceased?          Yes

            Describe what you heard, how clearly you heard it and what was communicated:    I heard a sucking or whooshing noise as the flash dissipated.

            Did the voice or sound seem to originate externally or outside of you, inside you, or did you not hear a voice or sound, but had a sense of knowing what was communicated?  It was outside of me, and it was a feeling like it was retreating or it used every bit of energy it had.

            If you heard a voice or sound, was it similar or dissimilar from the voice or sound the deceased made when they were alive?           It sounded just like the sound you hear when you take a Polaroid picture.

            Is there any possibility what you heard was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           No, the room was completely black, blinds drawn, door shut and no one else but my sleeping Husband next to me.

            Was there any possible impairment to your hearing at the time of the experience?   No

Did you feel a touch or experience any physical contact from the deceased?            No

Did you see the deceased?         Uncertain

I only saw a brilliant, powerful, blinding flash within a foot from my face.

            How clearly did the deceased appear?            This flash blinded me, and lit up the area around me.

            How much of the deceased did you see?       The center of this flash was about as big as a tennis ball, then shrunk to size of a marble.

            Is there any possibility what you saw was from any other source present in the surroundings at the time of your experience?           no

Did you smell a distinct smell, scent, fragrance or odor associated with the deceased?      No

How long did the experience last?        The whole event, from sensing something to it being completely gone was about 45 seconds.

Was the beginning and end of the experience gradual or more sudden?         it was sudden

Could you sense the emotions or mood of the deceased?           Uncertain

I would saw, it was around me, next to me, before it flashed.

How do you currently view the reality of your experience?           Experience was definitely real

            Please explain why you view the reality of your experience as real or not real:           I know I was wide awake, I felt, saw and heard it.

After reading someone else's story hear, I am even more confident in my experience.

            Was the experience dream like in any way?   No

Describe in detail your feelings/emotions during the experience:           I was sad and feeling very defeated.

Was there any emotional healing in any way following the experience?           Yes

Knowing that there is more to the  universe that we do not understand. The sense that a spirit was attempting to soothe or help me.

What was the best and worst part of your experience?      Just that it reassured me that in deed, life does not end here on Earth.

Has your life changed specifically as a result of your experience?         Yes                 Describe:            More at ease during hard times, knowing a higher power is near by to help.

Did the experience give you any spiritual understandings such as life, death, afterlife, God, etc.?            Yes     that there is no doubt that life does not stop with our physical body.

Death Compacts are when two or more living people promise among themselves that whoever dies first will try to contact the other(s).  Have you ever made such a compact?        No

Did you observe or hear anything regarding people or events during your experience that could be verified later?          Yes hearing someone else's account of nearly the identical thing. I remember watching a paranormal show where something similar happened to a team investigating.

What emotions did you feel during the experience?            Shock, stunned, confused and excited.

Was the experience witnessed or experienced by others?           Uncertain

My Husband was present but asleep.

Did you have any sense of altered space or time?   No

Did you have a sense of knowing, special knowledge, universal order and/or purpose?    Yes

A feeling of being privileged to witness this event.

Did you become aware of future events?       No

Did you experience a separation of your consciousness from your body?     No

Did you meet or see any other beings other than the deceased?            No

Did you see a light?           Yes  A brilliant white flash

Did any part of your experience seem to occur in a place other than the location described above?            No

Have you shared this experience with others?         Yes     Just my Husband.

Have you shared this experience formally or informally with any other researcher or web site?   No

Were there any associated medications or substances with the potential to affect the experience?            No

Following the experience, have you had any other events in your life, medications or substances which reproduced any part of the experience?         No 

Did you ever in your life have a near-death experience, out of body experience or other spiritual event?           Uncertain 

Did the questions asked and information you provided accurately and comprehensively describe your experience?               Yes

THANKS again for sharing your experience on the www.adcrf.org web